Halloween

(It was around 80 degrees on Halloween here this year.
Amazing.)

(Tilda scurrying away from the "HOT" pumpkins.)

Tried to get a pic of Lucky sniffing my ears...
he is always so curious.

Minus One

(Tuffy)

When I started this blog, four years ago (wha???) it was from a suggestion of my friend Ilaiy. I didn't know what to write about except that I had an odd li'l statistic in my life. I had 5 cats. Weird. Hard to admit sometimes and you just know that some people won't understand. Those that know us, though - and have been to our house, have always said that you could never tell we have five. You might actually only see three of the kitties so, I always wondered if we should just tell people we only have 3.

Now one is gone. Missing for 5 weeks now. My good friend, Lori, recently lost her sister to cancer and I can't imagine what she feels. Losing a cat is absolutely NOTHING compared to that. And I often feel down in the dumps and downright depressed about losing this measly cat.

I've posted fliers and ads and put fliers near mailboxes. (My husband, ever the law mindful man he is - - reminds me that it's illegal to put fliers in mailboxes so, I put them in the newspaper slot.) We check the pound - - the website and in person.

And the hardest part for me is the not knowing. If he's dead. (I have a feeling he is. It's just that I can't imagine him hearing my voice and not coming toward the sound.) If a grandma adopted him and is making him fatter than ever. I don't know. I just don't know. And I want to go around and scream for him at the top of my lungs but I guess decorum dictates that I just can't do that.

And the other, really hardest part is knowing that it is my fault. If I hadn't put him out...If I had kept him inside...If I hadn't tried so hard to keep him away from the couch he kept repeatedly peeing on...Maybe he wouldn't have gone so far.

He's gone and it's my fault.

And now when people see us at the store stocking up on cat litter and they ask: "How many cats DO you have????"

I hear my husband say: "Four."

Ouch.....

Baby Woof #2

We have some exciting news here...just got back from my first sono and I am about 8 weeks along.

Matilda looked at the screen while the sono was happening, pointed and said: "hippo"! And "circle"...that's about what the li'l baby looks like now! ;0)

Baby Hippo, it is then.

4th Weekend

We had a great weekend over the 4th. We took Matilda to the Children's Museum at Wilmington on Friday. She LOVED it! I almost thought of getting a yearlong pass...

(wish that one hadn't turned out sooo blurry!
She was sooo happy to be there!)

And then went to the Swansboro street fest for the 4th. Matilda wasn't too sure of the fireworks though so we left. She just kept saying: "Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!" So we scurried home...maaaybe next year???

(Right before she climbed down.
She posed like this by herself.)

She is getting sooo big! Sooo very tall. And really turning into a kid. It is amazing. She will be two in a few weeks...wow!

Can I just say that I'm _____.

What? Cranky...bored...kind of depressed.

And I don't know why...

No one wants to read blogs about people that aren't happy, right???

Waaah, waaah, waaah - I'm not happy. And I have no reason not to be. I have a great husband, a beautiful, smart daughter that I get to stay home with and....I'm just not happy recently. I'm not happy being ultra busy. I'm not happy sitting at home. I'm not motivated.

And today I'm emotional and hormonal. I am seriously going to need to look into getting some hormone reducing pills (someone please invent them) or something. I can't take it anymore!

And I feel awful - - soooo many people are suffering. Going through much worse stuff than me and I have NOTHING to complain about except the craziness in my head making me feel stressed out, impatient and blue.

Ugh.

Photos like this do make me smile though:

Real Big "Fish"

Here's me - - posing with a huge weed I pulled from our backyard. Mike said he was going to cut it down and I said: "Oh, you can just pull that." And I did.

I nearly fell over when it popped out, but I did it!! If our fence wasn't there, I would've landed on my arse.

(Those aren't our lovely bushes behind me...that's our neighbors house.)

And, a little helper carrying part of it away.

Weekend Fun

We headed to Raleigh this weekend to see Elmo Live! Matilda enjoyed it soooo much, I would definitely do it again. She was excited and enthralled. I even teared up because I was so happy she was happy! Such fun!









And filed under "The Kindness of Strangers" -- we stopped at a local pizza place on the way home and Matilda kept asking for "ollies...ollies...ollies". So, without adding a salad bar fee to our bill, our nice waitress brought our lovely, demanding daughter a bowl full of olives! How touching is that?

Leash Law

I think this might be a controversial issue...but I was just wondering what the consensus was on harnesses for toddlers??

I know that it's a sensitive topic...I'm not sure I understand why. To me, it is a safety issue. I have purchased a stuffed animal/backpack combo with a strap for me to hold on to and I used it once while traveling to see my family near St. Louis. I was just concerned that while toting my daughter through the airport, she might want down to wander on her own and it's just too big of a crowd to let her do that. I used it for a total of 10 minutes maybe. During that very short time, I felt like I got some strange looks...I think I even overheard a comment.

Sooooo, let's just say that you have a rowdy, rambunctious, independent daughter that likes to explore. What do you do? Stay home? Try to keep her from scrambling out of a cart or stroller whilst she is screaming bloody murder?

She says: "Walk, Mama."

So, I let her. And she runs around and away from me with an impish grin as if to say: "Come and get me."

I'm just at my wits end! We were at Target today with my grandma and, needless to say, grandma got very worried. The friend we were with said she'd never Matilda act like this before.

Normally, this would not be an issue because her dad manages her when we're out so that I can browse. He chases her through the store. I know that's tiresome for him, too...

I have no idea what to do. She LOVES her freedom. I want her to explore...just not go too far. I don't know if a "leash" is the answer or not...

Of course she's not a dog - - she's my daughter. My brilliant, energetic, independent daughter.

Really, who am I kidding???? She'd be mad as hell if I had the harness on her anyway. I guess I answered my own question...

Almost a Year Later

10 Valentine's Days...

My husband wrote in my card that this is our 10th Valentine's Day together and it really wowed me....

It is an understatement that time has flown for me. I don't think I can remember every year!

• I remember the first year. I bought him a Burroughs book and a card. He told me as I was leaving to go home that he didn't believe in Valentine's Day or something foreign to me like that...probably he just didn't get around to getting me something. I'm sure I couldn't hide my disappointment. What can I say? I'm a sap...a sucker for V-day.
  

• Surprisingly, the next year I received a beautiful, romantic delivery at work from Red Envelope.

• I'm fuzzy from here until I remember a time at OUR HOME after we were married and he fixed me orange roughy and snap peas that we ate by candlelight.

• Then I remember a year in we spent in Oklahoma City. I visited him while he was at training for work and I was pregnant with our daughter. I remember a rose with a sweet note greeting me at the door while I waited for him to get home from school that day...and the excitement we felt about us growing as a family.

• And last year was pretty blurry here...our first year in North Carolina...

• Then today, we signed more paperwork on our house, had frozen pizza at home and listened to music and danced with Matilda.

It's a beautiful life. The years are flying by...I can't believe it's been 10! (And not just because it's hard to believe we made it through that first one...) ;0)

I wouldn't trade a moment for anything. I'm so grateful to be where I am today. And look forward to 20 hundred million more...

Stimulatin' the Economy

BIG NEWS over here in the Woof world. We are doing our own small part to stimulate the economy. We bought a house!

I sure wish the tax credit had survived in the stimulus package...that would've been fantastic for us. And it would've made me feel better about our chances of selling when the time comes. But, in our neck of the woods, the market is pretty strong. We have a "transient market" with the military bases nearby, soooooooo...we're testing our luck!

Our new home as of the end of March:




Matilda helps our realtor review the paperwork:

What's that smell?!?!?!?!

Soooo, I'm not very good at keeping my car clean. But I remember being appalled by some people's cars who had kids. Melted crayons. Fries everywhere. And I just couldn't understand the mess.

But now, with Matilda, there are crackers, cookies, cookie dust...and MILK.

The past few days there has been a horrible spoiled-milk-like smell in the car. I remember telling my sister-in-law that it was like something died inside their. So, yesterday I pulled stuffed animals out and sniffed them. I spot-cleaned the car and the carseat. I left the windows open to air it out. STILL, NO improvement.

Tonight, Mike was pulling out the carseat for a full washing, doing some maintenance and found the culprit inside the trunk.

A dirty diaper I had forgotten to throw away. Seriously. We were out (a week or so ago), I changed Bilda's diaper - - no trash can in sight and I thought I'd throw it away at home.

The car smells a million times better already. And I'm reminded to never, ever judge people until I've walked a mile in their shoes...

Home

Home is a lot of things to a lot of people.

We got home around 3:30 A.M. Eastern time Saturday morning. It was a looooooong trip home. We stopped and bought a portable DVD player for Bilda so that she'd be entertained. And entertained she was! She didn't even sleep except for 30 minutes or so. She has developed a cough she picked up somewhere along the way and that eventually made for a cranky baby.

Thankfully, we made it home safely. I realize how blessed I am. I think about it all the time. If I had nothing but my husband and our daughter - - I could live contently forever.

But I can't help to wish for more. I want to be HOME with my family and loved ones. My only regret about leaving here would be the gorgeous weather...so I wish to bring the NC weather HOME...or I wish I could bring everyone and all the things that remind me of home here. It's hard. I'll have a heavy heart for a while. And my eyes will mist up quickly at just the thought or smell of home. I can smell my mom's house on the clothes I washed there. I found a coffee flavor I want to share with my dad. I want to hang out and talk with my sister. I want to see them WHENEVER I feel like it. I just can't do that right now and it's terrible.

I look to the future and I KNOW I'll be home or, at least, very close to home soon. When????????????? I have no idea.

But what a happy time that will be.